See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
