I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize