Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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