Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize