Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
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