Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
home. puking in laundry basket.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
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