Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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