Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
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