Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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