I think I can smell my own vagina right now
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Someone stole a lamp last night.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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