i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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