Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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