I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize