it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
