so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Randomize