So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Randomize
