Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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