I want to have your abortion
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Randomize
