Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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