**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
