yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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