Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
Randomize
