i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
