Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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