great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Randomize
