I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
