Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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