i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
