my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
My cat gives me a boner
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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