She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
