brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize
