It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
