i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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