No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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