I'd wear matching sweaters with you
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
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