nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
