i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
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