so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
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