I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.