If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as a side note pls kill me
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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