Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
