I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
