why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
