I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Randomize
