just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
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