I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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