sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
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At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
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