at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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