You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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