i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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