My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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